A New Baby

For most people they react with laughter and smiles to the birth of a new baby. Some may even shed tears of joy. And although deep down inside I share the same feelings, it is buried underneath the many reminders. The reminder of what I once looked forward to, the reminder of the joy I had, the reminder of what I almost had, the reminder of what I lost, the reminder of all the pain and sorrow I feel, the reminder of the huge hole I have in my heart, the reminder that that should be me. A part of me feels relieved when it doesn’t happen to someone else, but a part of me feels unfairness like they shouldn’t have what I don’t have. I know in time it will get easier for me to handle these new births, but right now it just hurts.

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One thought on “A New Baby

  1. I cannot even begin to image your loss or pain…OR the strength that lies within you to carry on day by day. You are in my thoughts and prayers so very often. You inspire me daily… much love to you, and I pray your pain will be eased in some fashion. I imagine it will never be easier, but I pray it will become bearable. I have never suffered the loss you have. Your and Paul’s writings touch my life. I can only imagine what it does for someone who bears the grief you do. Thank you!

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