I never experienced pain like I did the day our daughter died. It was completely unexpected and rocked our world to the core. I felt as if my heart was ripped out of my chest and I didn’t know how I could go on. I love each of my children with every part of me, even the one I hadn’t held in my arms. I never imagined I would experience something like this.
As I sit here and prepare for this weekend’s Easter service, I am reminded of something. God willingly gave up His son. He sent His son to Earth to die, for our sins, for me. I know the level of pain I felt when we lost Bella, unexpectedly, without warning. I can’t imagine the pain God must have felt when He gave His one and only son. He sacrificed His life so that we may be saved and have eternal life. He knew the death that He would endure. The torture and pain He would experience. How hard it must have been for Him to deny His son’s request to take that burden away.
I don’t know that I could willingly sacrifice one of my children. I love them more than words could describe. But to know that God’s love for me is greater than that, is unimaginable. My daughter, Bella, and His son, Jesus, dancing on streets of gold together, waiting for my arrival, is a vision so sweet and makes Easter that much more special to me.
Please do not overlook and take the time to read. This is very important!!! This was written by my husband for a very important project. You can help!
Give Bella a Voice!.
No other song can make me cry like this one. Written and sang by Selah, the song is a true account of one of Selah’s members, Todd and his wife Angie, who lost their baby girl at 32 weeks gestation. They delivered a baby girl named Audrey who lived for two and a half hours. She had many health conditions and although they knew for most of the pregnancy she might not ever survive, they left it in God’s hands. Like them, I had many plans for our daughter Bella. I was looking forward to all the big bows, the pretty pink dresses and everything that entails a little princess. I longed to hold her and kiss her constantly, to rock her to sleep, to hear her little feet running across the house. I loved her more than life itself, but there is someone who loved her more. Continue reading
I am an avid listener to my local Klove station. Music is therapeutic for me. It’s amazing how a song can explain and say everything you’re thinking and feeling at that moment. Music has definitely been my solace these last few months. One of the songs that has ministered greatly to me has been “Blessings” by Laura Story. She wrote this CD five years after her husband was hospitalized from a brain tumor. He has not received complete healing, yet they still continue to praise and worship God.
Despite the recent trials my family and I are going through, I know I am truly blessed. This song helps to bring a new perspective to Continue reading
It Was Not Wicked for the Lord to Take Our Son.
This is a link a friend sent me. Although our situation is a little different, it sheds light on our faith and what we believe in. Although we know all these great truths, it’s still hard for us to hold onto right now.